Before I tell you about my totally horrifying grocery store story, I would like to tell you a little flaw I have….I have NO self control when it comes to dessert. There, it is out in the open. I feel much better having told you this. I’m one of those people who love their desserts, and it is a bit of a problem. Lets say there’s a plate of cookies in the house; I will eat a few and feel guilty. Then, to make matters worse, I feel like I have to get rid of them quickly which in turn makes me eat even more (I do save some for my son). The theory being that if I eat them now then I cannot eat them later. Sound theory huh…more like moronic, but this is what I do. This is why I do not make or buy large amounts of desserts. If I do, I buy a serving for each of us, or if I make something I will take the rest to the neighbors.
On with my horrific story…
Yesterday, I went grocery shopping to get the items for our meal plan for the week. Upon entering the store I saw them. They were right there at the entrance waiting for me…knowing my weakness…cute little smiles plastered across their faces…GIRL SCOUTS! Oh the horror! It was all I could do not to turn tail and run, but we needed our groceries. With their cute little smiles they asked me if I would like to buy some cookies. My response, “I have to grocery shop first.” FIRST!?! What was I thinking saying “first”? Now I have to deal with them when I leave. I have no spine when it comes to Thin Mints and saying “no” to these sweet girls who are just trying to make money for their troop.
As I’m grocery shopping I come up with my escape plan to get out of the store without buying the cookies I know I will eat in less than 2 days. My Plan:
- Find a group of people leaving the grocery store at the same time as me.
- Blend in with said group.
- Make my escape while the other grocers are blocking the Girl Scouts’ view of me.
With my plan in place I looked to blend in with a group after paying for my groceries, and here came a group of 3 grocers. My plan was going to work perfectly! I merged in with them, and made my way towards the exit. The first grocer on my right broke off to buy cookies. This was fine. I still was safely hidden behind the 2 other grocers. Then, the unthinkable happened. Both of the women grocers that I was hiding behind made a U-turn!! What!?! This was not going according to my plans! This brought me to a dead stop as I watched the women literally turn tail and run…and I do mean run, from the Girl Scouts towards the exit on the other side of the grocery store. Then I remembered…there was another exit. Why the hell didn’t I think of that!?!
Of course, at this point I’m wide open, and 4 of the sweetest girls were asking me if I, “…would like to buy any cookies.” At this point I threw in the towel, put up my surrender flag, and bought those damn cookies. I beat the hell out of a guy who tried to mug me once, but I cannot say no to girls selling cookies. I’ve got major issues.
Therefore, with my cookies bought, I formed a new plan. Leave the dangerous cookies in the trunk of my car, and drop them off at work tomorrow for all my coworkers. I’ll let ya know how it goes.
Am I the only one with this problem?